
Asians.
We've all seen them.
We know who they are.
And they know who we are.
They make the movies that make you cuddle with that kid that you let take you to the movies, and you regret it because you didn't really want to go in the first place, and now your holding his hand, and you don't want to let go because you're afraid that the girl from The Ring will walk out from the movie screen if you do, even though it is physically impossible for someone to materialize from a screen, and if they could i highly doubt holding hands with that nerdy kid from science class would stop her.
Yep, those Asians.
And the Asians who make those fighting movies where the guy is attached to the string and can fly/kick/punch/backflip/do-crazy-asian-shit in the air. (Those are different kinds of Asians, kinda like a chimp and orangutan, but for the purpose of the incredibly long intro, they're the same.)
They have very distinct faces. One moment they could be saying, "Hey, wanna take of picture if me holding up this peace sign with my mouth wide open standing in front of this gate?" and the next minute they could trying to avenge their dead brother and you're the one stopping them.
Right now we're going to aim our attention to college Asians. I can't tell if there's lots of them here, or if i just see the same ones all the time, but one (possibly twenty) Asian(s) i saw today was/were rocking his flip flops, wearing rolled up sweat pants, and a wrinkly, half-buttoned, button-up shirt. His hair was mangy and pulled back into a i-have-no-idea-but-it-kinda-looks-like-my-friend's-sister-mixed-with-my-dog-and-a-hippy. First thought that came to my mind was, "Wow, this guy could fix my laptop AND i bet he'd share his weed!" (i don't smoke weed, but i respect the aspect of sharing, i won't even share a tandem bicycle.)
Now, this story would be completely different if the he was not Asian, if it was some white bloke i would have been thinking, "Wow, they let people go out in public like this? He looks like every guy i've ever seen on a sex offenders list." Plus, if he was white, i wouldn't have this epic intro. I think the intro should always be bigger than the story anyway. (By 'intro' i mean 'my penis' and by 'story' i mean 'Asian penis', but you probably already knew that.)
Well, that is what i learned at college today!
I am Christopher 'Your Face' Martinez, and i like random bolding.

Makes me wanna rent a Bruce Lee movie :)
ReplyDeleteHahah, why's that?
ReplyDeleteI thought by now you could recognize me...it's been me all this time....there hasn't been twenty asians. There has been ONE!! And your attempt of being Asian is a failure!! FAILURE! >_<
ReplyDeleteHilarious! Who's kid are you anyway? Sheesh
ReplyDelete